I arrived at yoga knowing what to expect because I had been there earlier in the week. We were working towards Crow pose. For those of you not familiar with that pose or even yoga in general, I will post a video down below for you to check out. It's a fun pose. But it's a difficult one for me. It takes a lot of core and upper body strength. Actually, I'd say it's pretty full body. For me, anyway. The problem I have with Crow isn't the physical aspect. I've pretty much worked that part out. But instead, it's the mental factor. It's the "Am I going to fall and break my face?"
It's the f e a r.
Have you ever read about the 7 spirits of God? A verse that has been circulating within my mind lately is Isaiah 11:2,
"The Spirit of the Lord will rest on him--
the Spirit of wisdom and of understanding,
the Spirit of counsel and of power,
the Spirit of knowledge and of the fear of
the Lord--"
During class, I was becoming a bit frustrated because I felt like I couldn't just "let go." Are you now singing that song in your head? You know the one...#sorrynotsorry Anyway, I was working hard to get my body in the correct position for Crow, and everything was great. I felt strong. I just knew my feet were going to come up off of the ground any second. But they didn't budge. It was just then that my instructor walked over and said "Sometimes it's just letting go of the fear." And as she was saying the words, my feet lifted. Houston, we have lift off! I needed that reminder in that very moment. Sometimes it is just as simple as letting go of the fear so you can move forward. But until you relent and let it go...nothing will change. I know you're no quitter, but sometimes you gotta quit the fear and tell it where to go. #fearcangotohell
After class my daughter and I hit up a local bakery for some goodies. A mommy and Macy date. She picked out a delicious pastry and I got my usual garlic bagel. I really prefer the everything bagel, but they were all out. Apparently, I am not the only one who likes them. I also ordered an almond milk latte with honey because this place has the best and creamiest. That barista, she knows what she's doing.
Macy and I grabbed our treats and picked a seat. She really wanted to sit outside, but it was already super hot and humid. Another characteristic of Texas Summer. She reluctantly agreed to sit inside next to the big pretty windows so she could see outside. I snapped a picture of her eating her delicious strawberry brioche. It's what dreams are made of, friends. And then she said, "Hey Mom, let me take your picture too." So I handed over my iPhone and she snapped a quick picture of me with my bagel. She even gave me a few options to pick from. She's pretty awesome like that. Macy decided to walk outside and check out the view from the patio. While she was doing that, I picked up my phone to scroll through the pictures and add a couple to my Insta story. I noticed in each picture of me there was a blue-ish blur next to me. I thought that was kind of weird and I even tried to find one without it. Nope, there were blurs in each one. If you're thinking I am not the type of person to go down that rabbit hole...Well, let me surprise you. I am totally THAT person. What could this mean? Spiritual significance?
And then I remembered something that I had read about the 7 Spirits of God and their colors. Which one was blue? I couldn't remember so I quickly went to my email where I had made a note about this very thing on May 1, 2019.
Blue: Spirit of Might
And then the verse that has been showing up in my mind on repeat started to make sense. As I dug even deeper, I found gems that my Heavenly Father has planted for me. Verses I have been reading started to take on a deeper meaning. I could take them and literally apply them to my life or see where I already had. It was like magic. But it wasn't magic at all...It was Yahweh.
2 Timothy 1:6-7 (NIV) for example,
"For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands. For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline."
As I was reading, the Holy Spirit was highlighting certain parts of the text for me. Aligning them with teachings I have recently digested. Spirit of power being one of those. But keep reading...
2 Timothy 1:8-9 (NIV)
"So do not be ashamed to testify about our Lord, or ashamed of me his prisoner. But join with me in suffering for the gospel, by the power of God, who has saved us and called us to a holy life-- not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace. This grace was given us in Christ Jesus before the beginning of time..."
S T O P right there.
Yes, you read that correctly. This Grace was given to us before the beginning of time! Let that sink in, ya'll. That is CRAZY! How? What? When? Where? Why? It's just too much to even begin to wrap my tiny human brain around. There is no logic that can reason this. It just is. It's how He operates.
There have been many times in my life that I felt like I was being called by my Heavenly Father to fulfill a purpose. But because I felt inadequate or not good enough..."How could I ever do that? I am not an expert. I am not equipped!" Sound familiar? I know I missed out on opportunities to do His will because I "chickened out." If we don't pick up our torch and finish our part of the race, He will find someone else to do it. Because one way or another it is getting d o n e.
He doesn't call on us because of who we are or what we are capable of on our own. Remember..."not because of anything WE have done but because of HIS own purpose and grace." He calls us because he wants to work through us. He has given us everything we need.
"...for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose."
Philippians 2:13 (NIV)
You're scared? You feel unequipped? Are you in a season of suffering? Sounds about right. But I have news for you! He is breathing His MIGHT and His Power over you to help you fulfill your calling and purpose. His ways are not our ways. And that is why he said "lean not on your own understanding" (Proverbs 3:5).
If you feel like you're being called to something-- Friend, NOW is the time to step into it. NOW is the time to say "Here I am, Lord! Use me. Send me! I am all in." The power is inside all of us. It is in YOU! It was there before the beginning.
And if you feel like you're in a season of struggle I want you to know that your breakthrough-- your power is right around the corner. So do not relent. Do not give in to the fear. Do not give up hope. Because...sometimes it's just letting go of the fear that will give you lift off. Lean in to your Father and be obedient. Get in His Word and see what gems He's planted for your very eyes.
"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."
Romans 15:13 (NIV)
And make sure you crank this one loud. Just as I was finishing up this post this song came on. Coincidence? Ya'll know I don't believe in such a thing. He wastes nothing. Can I get an Amen?!
I know breakthrough is coming.
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