Open The Door

She pulled out the cutest decorative kitchen towel and said “This is for you. Thank you for hosting.” And my heart just swelled as tears filled my eyes. She had no idea that I actually collect dish towels. I love to use them as a pop of color in my very black and white kitchen. There’s no way she could have known how sweet of a gift this simple dish towel was to me. And how meaningful it was to know that I am thought of, not just by my friend, but by my Heavenly Papa.  

I asked her, “Did you know that I collect dish towels.”

She replied, “No, I didn’t. But as I was packing it was sitting next to my bag and Holy Spirit just said to pack it too. So I did. And I didn’t really know who it was for, until I got here.”

This, my friends, is a prime example of why it is so important to be sensitive to the voice of Holy Spirit. Because of her simple act of obedience she was able to bless me in a deep and meaningful way. This act of kindness from my friend was a reminder from my Heavenly Father that he knows me. He sees me. And he doesn’t miss a detail; even the tiniest ones that we would think he doesn’t care about.

The truth is he cares deeply. And nothing is wasted.

Why did I need such a reminder on this specific day? Earlier that morning I experienced a major disappointment. It was a costly disappointment in more than just a financial aspect. I needed that reminder that I was seen and cared for regardless of what I was feeling emotionally.

Sensitive 

This experience also made me want to become even more sensitive to the Holy Spirit. He is our helper. And I want and need his help like never before. I have prayed many times that my Heavenly Father would use me to glorify him and build his kingdom. “Here I am, Father, use me!”

But the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you. John 14:26 (NIV)

Oh, Jesus. Sweet, sweet Jesus. In the small excerpt above, Jesus is speaking with the disciples. He is explaining to them that he is going away, but he has asked the Father to send us a helper, the Spirit of truth. And he also says that he will be with us forever. So not only did Jesus go to the cross to suffer and die for us, but he made sure that we would have a friend and counselor here with us on this earth. Today, I am overwhelmed by this truth. I am overtaken by the thoughtfulness and eagerness to make sure that we have a friend who will help us and teach us. Jesus has been advocating for us since before we even existed here on this earth. That thought melts my heart and leaves me speechless.

Curious to Know

I am so curious to know the Holy Spirit better. To know and recognize his voice above all others, and especially above my own thoughts. I want to be sensitive to him and his ways. I want to be taught by him. So how do I do these things? How does one become more sensitive to the Holy Spirit?

It’s way more simple than I could ever wrap my brain around. It’s as simple as growing in relationship with the Father. When I know Him, then I’ll be able to discern.

And how do I get to know my Heavenly Papa better? Well, I must read the Word he has given us. A friend recently prayed over me that I would salivate for the Word of God. That I would crave it and it’s truth. Let me tell you, that prayer has absolutely come to pass. When I open my Bible I become as giddy as a kid on Christmas. Seriously, I do! There are so many amazing gems hidden in the word. It’s the most entertaining mysterious read ever written. Studying and knowing the scriptures are both imperative acts if you want to know the Father.

I want to know him. I want to know his heart. And I want my heart to mirror his.

His Heart

I was sitting in a sandwich shop one day with my daughter. We picked out our sandwiches and sat down to enjoy our lunch and some much needed mother-daughter conversation. She was 8 at the time, and I love any chance I get to chat one on one with her. She is such a light in this dark world. She inspires me daily to be better.

As we were eating I just got a feeling. I felt oddly drawn to two gentlemen who were sitting a few tables away enjoying their lunches. Finally, looking up from my sandwich, I engaged with that still quiet voice nudging me to pay attention to the two men. I then had a thought. It wasn’t anything loud or boisterous. I didn’t hear an audible voice from the heavens. The thought was this…”That is my son over there. I love him and I am so proud of him.”

Immediately after the thought came I felt overwhelmingly like I needed to go and tell this stranger what the Father had said about him. I began to sweat profusely. And my hands started to tremble. For me this is a sure sign that Holy Spirit is up to something.

Just this week I had prayed to my Father and told him I would be obedient when he asked me to do something. I am not kidding. And clearly, He was testing this out.

But I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t get out of my chair. I was scared. I was embarrassed. What would this guy think? How was he going to react?

While I was struggling with this internal dialogue, the two men got up and left the restaurant. And as I saw them get in their car and drive away I felt so defeated. I felt like I had failed. And I immediately repented.

“Father, I am so sorry. If you will give me a second chance to share this with that young man, I will do it. I will be obedient. I will not falter. Lord, I am so sorry. Please forgive me and help me to do your will.”

My daughter and I finished our sandwiches, cleaned up our table, and left. I was feeling so low. I had just prayed to the Father that I would be obedient and in an instant I had failed him. At that moment I glanced at my gas gage and realized it was extremely low. I was hoping we had enough to make it to the gas station right down the road. Driving on fumes, literally, we made it to the station. I pulled up to an open pump and noticed the man sitting in the passenger side of a van with the door opened at the pump RIGHT NEXT TO MINE. It was the same young man that I had failed to share the message with.

This was my chance and I was not about to let it slip by again.

I whispered, “Thank you, Father” with tears in my eyes and walked the whole 5 steps over the young man and said exactly what I had heard Holy Spirit say…”Excuse me sir. I am so sorry to bother you. And this might sound kind of crazy, but my daughter and I were just at the sandwich shop. I noticed you and your friend having lunch. And Heavenly Father wanted you to know that you are his son. He loves you and he is so proud of you. Anyway, I know this seems strange. But just wanted to tell you. Thanks so much!”

He looked at my with eyeballs as big as a saucer and said “Wow. Thank you.”

And that was that.

Thank you Jesus for second chances! Our Creator is the God of second chances. Actually, he is the God of second chances, third chances , fourth, fifth...as many as it takes. He never gives up on us.

Known

I don’t know what God was doing in that young man’s life. But I know I was given the chance to play a part on the relay team. And I was honored to do so.

Today, I am ever so grateful for the truth that we are known. We are known so intricately. And that truth melts me. God’s heart, it melts me. He is constantly moving towards us with wide open arms. Run towards them. Run like you’ve never run before. Because that embrace is one that cannot be described. And if you think you are unworthy. You are right. We are unworthy. But that’s just it, he doesn't want us because WE are worthy. 

He wants us because HE IS WORTHY. He doesn’t care. He wants you. All of you. Even the broken parts. 

Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me. Revelation 3:20 (NIV)

All you have to do is open the door.